Tuesday, December 19, 2006

New beginning life without Mom

Monday was a difficult day, my mom Violet Margaret Moses, was buried next to my Father, her husband of what should have been 61 years had the fates been kind to them. There was only a small gathering, immediate family only and then the grandkids that could get the time off of work.

I had no clue we were to be asked to say something. The first story that came to mind, was the sterling silver safety pin. I was doing a show during Mothers Day weekend, did it every year. I had this idea to do a sterling silver safety pin, with a round loop so that a dangle could be suspended to hang as a lapel pin. I got so thrilled when it worked, I created pins that had 3 loops and even 5 loops. It was a very large pin. Mothers Day, I presented her with a pin, and a series of pendant dangles, and waited for her response. "you gave me a safety pin" "yes mom, but it is a sterling silver pin, and I made it" she looked at me over the tops of her glasses, "you MADE a safety pin?" "yes, mom I did, but it is silver." She still looked at it strangely, I could see where this was going, so I said, "mom, you put it on your desk to look pretty and you wear the pendants on a chain." "Oh, wonderful, where is the chain?"

later in the evening we had the memorial dinner, in a beautiful hotel, buffet. Mom would have loved it. The tables were assembled in a U shape, the intro to the evening made, and then, more about us telling a story. argggg ok, I'm middle kid, older sister Nancy started off, in fact, she had notes written up, unfair! She spoke of mom teaching her to cook, um, nope I couldn't use that one, my idea of home made soup started with Bear Creek dry soup mix, hey, I added cubed potatoes...And other stuff, but baking pies? We are working on 30 years of marriage I have never made a pie from scratch. She was no help to me.

Younger sister Barbi was sitting next to Nancy, across the room, far apart as we could be, she was making eye contact, and I gave the universal signal to jump on in, cause I wasn't gonna say anything yet. As the silence grew longer, she got the message, gave a loving glare and stood up. wheeew, had a bit more time, but she wasn't talking like her story would be long. And it wasn't, but the thread seemed to be that mom's have this innate ability to nail the essence of you as a kid, and keep it after you grow to adulthood.

my turn, first I had to say, ok, people, I don't stand,and if I do it's just not pretty, so just listen ok? (I guess I never mentioned the wheelchair) and I spoke of the up the fact that when I was in high school I worked at an upscale department store, in all departments, including China and Glassware. My duties there included selling place settings of Lenox/Waterford/you get the idea. Stock was kept on tall shelves, ladders were used. One handed at times. Yet, when ever she came to meet me for a dinner hour or break, I would get the same speech, "watch your sleeves, hold your handbag in front of you and don't touch anything. And I would do it, till I caught sight of my other sales people doubled over laughing. I also should mention at home and at school I was a mega Klutz, and could and did, trip over my shadow.

It is just built in to mothers. I myself have planned ahead, taking pictures of our daughters bedroom disasters, so when she had kids, and yells and screams, I can bring out the appropriate age/picture and say,"hey kids, wanna see some dirty pictures.....Of your mamma's bedroom..." Hey I warned her I was doing this. Not my fault she didn't believe me. (or the fact I have no clue where I put them to be safe and sound

course she was sitting next to us, her sweet daughter asleep and missing it all, and missing mandy's mention of when is it I needed the next oxygen tank exchange? Um, I turned the floor over to baby brother. Age in 40's some where.......Wait I didn't mention o2 either? gezzzzz. I got to get the very first entry finished and out.....

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